At this time in my life, it's all about moving forward for me. One of my biggest 'crutches' has always been getting stuck in the past and not letting go. These days however, I feel I've made great efforts to focus my life on the future and living in the moment. I'm not a big one for birthdays or xmas, I think everyday should be celebrated and there shouldn't be a specific time or season when we should treat each other better and be in the "xmas spirit". But I recognize that milestones and land mark days are nice, and they do give us all an opportunity to share special moments with one another. Today is August 4th, I have been clean and sober for 5 years now...
I remember when I was in rehab, wow difficult it was for me to understand MY condition. Although all of us were obvious addicts, I was somewhat in a unique situation and different from most of the guys in the program. They all seemed to have many things in common, there were so many things that I didn't understand and couldn't relate to, I almost left 2 days in. We would sit and have group talks, and although I would speak at my turn, I wasn't really telling anyone anything significant to the cause, but in my defence I was trying to figure out what was going on myself! Then one day when it was my turn to speak, it just happened, I started telling everyone about my life, about my family, friends, the past, loves, tennis, EVERYTHING. It became emotional, I let everything go. Fuck. Although it felt like I should be embarrassed, I was ok, I looked around the room and it seemed that everyone else was crying with me, I felt a lot closer to the guys, I shared things with them that I never shared with anyone in my life, and they in return also 'shared'. Then I started understanding my condition and how I became an alcoholic and a drug addict, I began to understand how I became so uncomfortable in my own skin, why I was on a path to destroy myself. I began to see the reasons for everything. Especially the reasons why I couldn't use anymore. I had to quit. Everything. If I wanted to live my life the way I wanted to, it had to be without alcohol, and drugs. But to go the REST of my life without EVER doing it again? This was a difficult proposition. An impossible one to me.
There are many slogans in AA. Cliches if you will. They all help, different ones for different people. On Facebook you see people post positive reinforcement quotes all the time, they're all great, but some will resonate more with you than others. Some will stick out, change your way of thinking, forever. OR, maybe just for that day. I remember telling one of the counselors there that I couldn't see myself going the REST OF MY LIFE without drinking ever again. His response I will never forget, it became the one slogan that changed my way of living, he said that I didn't have to worry about staying clean the rest of my life, I only had to worry about today. One day at a time. It stuck with me. And to this day, when I write my list of goals for the day, the first one on the list is STAY SOBER, STAY CLEAN. And for the last 5 years, there's been a check mark everytime it has been written down.
Who knows what life will bring. I think the one gift that sobriety has given me has been to treasure each and every moment in it's own place. To value everyone that comes into my life, and to treasure the time you have with them. To celebrate everybody in my life. You just never know when that collection of people will ever happen again. I'm an emotional person. I cry. Since rehab, it's impossible for me to keep things in, I shed tears all the time, especially in happy moments. But, that's how I roll, I'm ok with it. It's me. Today is an emotional day for me. It's a happy landmark day, I've been clean and sober for 5 years. There are so many things for me to be grateful and happy for. One thing especially great about August 4th...it's my niece's birthday!
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
The Journey Continues
So back it again. My blog, my never-ending struggle. To stop, to return, to resume, to leave. I always have my reasons to write and my belief in doing it. Then, I always have my reasons to stop and never write again. I guess these days I'm trying to not read too much into it, I'm too deep of a person for my own good, the truth, as best as I know it, has really been the best way to go, and in the end I try to deliver it, with no other purpose then to actually, tell the truth. Once again, I've gone a long time without blogging. My blog since it's inception has taken on many meanings, themes and purposes, I've really given up trying to make sense of it all, let's just say the blog is really what it should've always been, just a simple documentation and journal of my journey to pursue my dream in becoming the best competitive boxer I can be. I've tried to keep my blog simple, and focus on the boxing, and keep my personal life out of it. I 've come to the realization that in order to continue to write my blog consistently, it is impossible to keep my personal life separate from my boxing journey. My boxing journey IS my personal life, and everything that happens to me personally, affects my boxing, everything. I am too emotional of a person to have it any other way. So much of my existence is dependent on energy, so much of that energy comes from my emotions. Sounds crazy to some I'm sure, to me, it's math. I understand myself better than I ever have at any point in my life, I understand my nature, I accept it now. The truth is, when thing are chaotic in my personal life, there's a good chance that I will stop blogging, I've been gone for a while, so you can figure it out. I haven't blogged since GoldenGloves. Which reminds me...
I will fill you all in on my GoldenGloves experience later this week, right now, I suppose I'm introducing my return to the blog and... to the ring. I fractured (or I should say Paul fractured) my ribs in 2 places after I received a nice body shot from one of my sparring partners. This was 6 and a half weeks ago, the Dr said I would be out 6-8 and well, I tried my best to make a return sooner but my body just wouldn't heal. It is my 3rd cracked rib in a little over a year. Since I've taken up boxing I've been no stranger to injury and being out. This time though it really hurt, I was unable to really do anything, experiencing pain in coughing, laughing, sleeping and the worst...sneezing. But I am happy to say that I am back, today was my first day back sparring and it felt great. I took some, landed some, the ribs got tested and I THINK they passed! I've had a lot of time to reflect in the last couple of months and mentally I feel better than I ever have. I feel more determined than ever and have a renewed sense of purpose. I am competing now, I'm in the game. Again. Things are different now, I have a great team around me that believe in me, and I myself am starting to believe that this dream of mine can really happen. I love boxing. I love my trainer. I love my teammates. I love my peers. I love the special friends I have made from boxing. I love being at the gym. I'm looking forward to the next part of my journey. With Denton on the rise, Namah's birth in pro boxing. Lucas' unfinished business, and of course the 'dream' of yours truly, it's such an exciting time at BBSV.
So once again folks, it's time to tag along. To share in something special, to be part of the human condition, to love, be loved and to help our fellow man get through this painful, curious and wonderful thing called life. Join me, as I join you, laugh with me, cry with me, but most of all, TRY with me. Let's put forth the effort in becoming better at all things, especially becoming better people, let's be good to one another, we're all we've got. Each other. THAT'S my dream, anyway you slice it. Care to share?
I will fill you all in on my GoldenGloves experience later this week, right now, I suppose I'm introducing my return to the blog and... to the ring. I fractured (or I should say Paul fractured) my ribs in 2 places after I received a nice body shot from one of my sparring partners. This was 6 and a half weeks ago, the Dr said I would be out 6-8 and well, I tried my best to make a return sooner but my body just wouldn't heal. It is my 3rd cracked rib in a little over a year. Since I've taken up boxing I've been no stranger to injury and being out. This time though it really hurt, I was unable to really do anything, experiencing pain in coughing, laughing, sleeping and the worst...sneezing. But I am happy to say that I am back, today was my first day back sparring and it felt great. I took some, landed some, the ribs got tested and I THINK they passed! I've had a lot of time to reflect in the last couple of months and mentally I feel better than I ever have. I feel more determined than ever and have a renewed sense of purpose. I am competing now, I'm in the game. Again. Things are different now, I have a great team around me that believe in me, and I myself am starting to believe that this dream of mine can really happen. I love boxing. I love my trainer. I love my teammates. I love my peers. I love the special friends I have made from boxing. I love being at the gym. I'm looking forward to the next part of my journey. With Denton on the rise, Namah's birth in pro boxing. Lucas' unfinished business, and of course the 'dream' of yours truly, it's such an exciting time at BBSV.
So once again folks, it's time to tag along. To share in something special, to be part of the human condition, to love, be loved and to help our fellow man get through this painful, curious and wonderful thing called life. Join me, as I join you, laugh with me, cry with me, but most of all, TRY with me. Let's put forth the effort in becoming better at all things, especially becoming better people, let's be good to one another, we're all we've got. Each other. THAT'S my dream, anyway you slice it. Care to share?
Thursday, April 18, 2013
GO TEAM DESTINY!!!!!
The Tournament is at The Four Points Sheraton Hotel, 1150 Wellington Rd South, London Ont. Like most boxing events usually I would be on a card along with maybe 6 or 7 other scheduled fights all taking place on a Saturday night or a specific time and day on the weekend. It has been difficult to tell people that want to come when I will be fighting, the truth of the matter is I don't know. The weigh-ins are tomorrow morning at 9am, after that they will draw out of a hat as to the order the fights will go on. The Gold Medal matches are on Sunday. If I fight friday and win, I will have to weigh-in again on the next day I fight. I could speculate or assume or guess that I will be fighting friday night, this will most LIKELY be the case, but I just don't know. I've been advised to expect to fight at any time and to be perpared for anything.
The tickets you can get there, I know a weekend pass is $60, I am assuming a day pass is $25, great value, you can see a lot of fights, quality boxing and entertainment. Obviously I would love the support from anybody who can come, Team Destiny would love it too. I know that many people have msgd me wanting to come and support me and I apologize for not being able to get back to people, I have really locked down my focus so I hope you all understand, the truth is I haven't even responded to my own family with any details and many of them are waiting for this blog entry as well. I also knew that I would be unable to give a time and/or day that I would be fighting and this would greatly effect people's ability to attend.
SO!!! I will post on my status on FB after the weigh-ins and give everyone as much details as I can. Forgive me if I don't respond, I am focused on what I have to do to perform and support my team as well. I would love to see as many friends and family there but I TOTALLY understand the inconvenience of the situation. There will be plenty more opportunities in the future. Hopefully!
So, we're here, the start of my journey, the start of my competitive boxing career. All the training is done, all the preparation. There is nothing left to do but compete to the best of my ability and enjoy this moment. There are so many people to thank, it would take up a whole blog page, but I just wanted to thank a few people that have helped me on the way to Golden Gloves specifically and not neccesarily my journey, just people that have aided me in preparation for this tournament. Chris, Lucas, Erika, for getting me ready, Dr.T for helping me overcome a dabilitating injury, Conor for throwing punches at me doing slip drills, The staff at Beertown, especially DC, Asian Brother, Simon, BLT, Meadows, you guys tended to my every pain in the ass request with my food and helped me remain discipline in my eating habits although it was chicken and veg with no sauce or beef patty with nothing but tomatoes, no one could make that shit taste good, but you guys always did, I wouldn'tve been able to make weight without you guys. Adriel for all the extra mitt work, especially when Oma passed and I was unable to train at the gym for a week, we put in some great work together, unreal time too. Thank you Denton, for all the talks and advice and putting me through the best(worst) 13 rounds of hell I have ever experienced, but mostly for showing me how to train like a champion, you redefined what I thought was 'hard work'. Jags, for all the love and support and for caring for EVERYONE at BBSV. The kids from March break, you did so many things for me, mostly reminded me of the reason I have passion for boxing, kids, and life. And lastly Jewel, for putting me on the team, and having faith that maybe I'll 'show you something'. You and the gym have meant more to me than you can know, I hope I can show my appreciation through my effort this weekend.
Hope to see some of you there, I will be posting details as soon as I know them. As my journey(boxing) proceeds, there will be significant events that take place, the first was the Golden Glove tryouts, I dedicated my effort there to Katie. I ended up making the team, so being superstitious, I'm going to dedicated my efforts this weekend as well. So this one's for the 40-plus crowd, to those that still believe that you're never too old and that it's never too late, I dedicate this effort to you. Dreams CAN come true, no matter how big or small, if it matters to YOU, that's all that counts. As long as you try. TRY.
The tickets you can get there, I know a weekend pass is $60, I am assuming a day pass is $25, great value, you can see a lot of fights, quality boxing and entertainment. Obviously I would love the support from anybody who can come, Team Destiny would love it too. I know that many people have msgd me wanting to come and support me and I apologize for not being able to get back to people, I have really locked down my focus so I hope you all understand, the truth is I haven't even responded to my own family with any details and many of them are waiting for this blog entry as well. I also knew that I would be unable to give a time and/or day that I would be fighting and this would greatly effect people's ability to attend.
SO!!! I will post on my status on FB after the weigh-ins and give everyone as much details as I can. Forgive me if I don't respond, I am focused on what I have to do to perform and support my team as well. I would love to see as many friends and family there but I TOTALLY understand the inconvenience of the situation. There will be plenty more opportunities in the future. Hopefully!
So, we're here, the start of my journey, the start of my competitive boxing career. All the training is done, all the preparation. There is nothing left to do but compete to the best of my ability and enjoy this moment. There are so many people to thank, it would take up a whole blog page, but I just wanted to thank a few people that have helped me on the way to Golden Gloves specifically and not neccesarily my journey, just people that have aided me in preparation for this tournament. Chris, Lucas, Erika, for getting me ready, Dr.T for helping me overcome a dabilitating injury, Conor for throwing punches at me doing slip drills, The staff at Beertown, especially DC, Asian Brother, Simon, BLT, Meadows, you guys tended to my every pain in the ass request with my food and helped me remain discipline in my eating habits although it was chicken and veg with no sauce or beef patty with nothing but tomatoes, no one could make that shit taste good, but you guys always did, I wouldn'tve been able to make weight without you guys. Adriel for all the extra mitt work, especially when Oma passed and I was unable to train at the gym for a week, we put in some great work together, unreal time too. Thank you Denton, for all the talks and advice and putting me through the best(worst) 13 rounds of hell I have ever experienced, but mostly for showing me how to train like a champion, you redefined what I thought was 'hard work'. Jags, for all the love and support and for caring for EVERYONE at BBSV. The kids from March break, you did so many things for me, mostly reminded me of the reason I have passion for boxing, kids, and life. And lastly Jewel, for putting me on the team, and having faith that maybe I'll 'show you something'. You and the gym have meant more to me than you can know, I hope I can show my appreciation through my effort this weekend.
Hope to see some of you there, I will be posting details as soon as I know them. As my journey(boxing) proceeds, there will be significant events that take place, the first was the Golden Glove tryouts, I dedicated my effort there to Katie. I ended up making the team, so being superstitious, I'm going to dedicated my efforts this weekend as well. So this one's for the 40-plus crowd, to those that still believe that you're never too old and that it's never too late, I dedicate this effort to you. Dreams CAN come true, no matter how big or small, if it matters to YOU, that's all that counts. As long as you try. TRY.
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Staying Focused
As my journey towards Golden Gloves continues, things in my personal life have become a little difficult. With 4 weeks left until the tournament (less than 2 weeks now), I made a pact with myself, that I wasn't going to have any excuses. I was going to adhere to my routine, stay focused, battle through all injuries, and most importantly, get my work in and continue to train everyday and get my road work in(running schedule). Afterall, although most boxers are treating Golden Gloves very seriously, it's different for me, it's emotional. I've waited 42 years for this moment to compete at the sport I love. It is special for me to be a part of Team Destiny, it is even more special for me to be a part of our dynamic team, a team with such a range of quality people and personalities, I'm extremely happy and proud, just to be their team mate. It is also a special time for D-Mac and I, we've shared a special friendship and bond and have brought out the best in one another, Golden Gloves will provide some of the reward for that for sure. There are so many reasons that this is important for me, I don't know where to begin. I guess I just did! This is the start of my boxing career. By the time Golden Gloves starts, most competitors would've felt that they have waited 8 weeks for the day to arrive, I feel like I've waited my whole life. I get chills thinking about it, it brings me to tears almost every time.
The weight cut alas is over. After experiencing difficulty after getting to 142(I'm fighting at the 139lbs category), feeling weak in training and not looking good, I made a decision to not diet to drop weight, to eat healthy, no junk, and just train hard. I was prepared to go into the tournament at 143-144 and just cut the water weight the day of. I wasn't really looking forward to this, even though Syd felt I would be fine. This last week of training has been my best ever, and I have ignored the scale as much as possible, this morning I stepped on, and was overjoyed to discover that....I was 140lbs! I feel strong, look great(compared to looking almost sick at 142) and feel a big relief.
Along with the weight cut news, I have also made an effort to work with some guys at the gym doing mitts(pad work) whenever possible. I've also scheduled days with my roommate and my cousin to get extra work in as well. This has also aided in my improvement and has given me a lot of confidence that I can execute some combinations that I feel I can use and will be successful with. I have some 'tricks' up my sleeve for the tournament, I know I can pull it off.
I've also found a way to train with a serious injury that I got at the tryouts. I feel that it is almost healed and that I've mentally gotten tougher from this, it has raised my confidence and belief in myself even more. So, I'm building myself up, I feel better everyday, and I will have absolutely NO excuses come tournament time, I'm going to put it all out there, give it EVERYTHING I have, and have no regrets, whatsoever. I'm focused. Sure there are tons of things going on in my personal life,(things keep piling, my grandmother passed this morning) but I've learned from mistakes in the past, and I am staying focused on what I need do.
Most importantly, I'm going to have fun. I'm going to enjoy the moment. Every minute. I'm going to embrace the company of my teammates and celebrate their efforts. I'm going to fight like I've never fought before, I'm going to live out my dream, I'm going to compete with heart and love every second that I am in there, even when I'm getting punched in the face! I don't know if I will win, I don't know how I will perform, but I do know that when that bell sounds to end my time at GoldenGloves I will have nothing left, because I plan on leaving it all in the ring.
The weight cut alas is over. After experiencing difficulty after getting to 142(I'm fighting at the 139lbs category), feeling weak in training and not looking good, I made a decision to not diet to drop weight, to eat healthy, no junk, and just train hard. I was prepared to go into the tournament at 143-144 and just cut the water weight the day of. I wasn't really looking forward to this, even though Syd felt I would be fine. This last week of training has been my best ever, and I have ignored the scale as much as possible, this morning I stepped on, and was overjoyed to discover that....I was 140lbs! I feel strong, look great(compared to looking almost sick at 142) and feel a big relief.
Along with the weight cut news, I have also made an effort to work with some guys at the gym doing mitts(pad work) whenever possible. I've also scheduled days with my roommate and my cousin to get extra work in as well. This has also aided in my improvement and has given me a lot of confidence that I can execute some combinations that I feel I can use and will be successful with. I have some 'tricks' up my sleeve for the tournament, I know I can pull it off.
I've also found a way to train with a serious injury that I got at the tryouts. I feel that it is almost healed and that I've mentally gotten tougher from this, it has raised my confidence and belief in myself even more. So, I'm building myself up, I feel better everyday, and I will have absolutely NO excuses come tournament time, I'm going to put it all out there, give it EVERYTHING I have, and have no regrets, whatsoever. I'm focused. Sure there are tons of things going on in my personal life,(things keep piling, my grandmother passed this morning) but I've learned from mistakes in the past, and I am staying focused on what I need do.
Most importantly, I'm going to have fun. I'm going to enjoy the moment. Every minute. I'm going to embrace the company of my teammates and celebrate their efforts. I'm going to fight like I've never fought before, I'm going to live out my dream, I'm going to compete with heart and love every second that I am in there, even when I'm getting punched in the face! I don't know if I will win, I don't know how I will perform, but I do know that when that bell sounds to end my time at GoldenGloves I will have nothing left, because I plan on leaving it all in the ring.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Some Info
So here are some details for The Ontario Golden Gloves Championships. They will take place In London, Ont at The Four Points Sheraton Hotel on the weekend of April 19-21. The winners will advance to The Nationals in BC on July 19, the winners from that competition will go on to The World Cup! I believe there are several people on our team that could go all the way to the World Cup I would not be one of them, The OBA (Ontario Boxing Association) divides the competition classes very fairly and attempts to break down the categories very specifically. I will be competing in the novice category(those that have 10 amateur fights or less) as opposed to the elite category(more than 10 fights). Only those that compete in the elite category will be eligible to go on to Nationals and Worlds. I'm good with that, I just want to compete.
Which brings up some details. We are looking for me to compete at the 139lbs weight class, the next category above will be 147lbs. Syd would like to see me fight at 139lbs. We feel that the 147 lbs category will be tougher for me, and that I will be able to 'hold my own' better at 139. At the time of the tryouts I was 153ish. This morning I was 145. Last week I managed to get down to 142.6, but that was after a workout in a sweatsuit! Realistically I have to get to 142, the rest of the weight I can lose overnight and in a sweatsuit, simply losing 'water' weight. The last time I remember weighing 140lbs, I was in grade 10. I've been a little concerned with how I would feel at that weight so I wanted to get to it as soon as I could before the tournament. The weight cut has not gone well for me. Last week, I feel I dropped too much, too quickly and was very weak in training. Last tuesday in sparring, my legs were shaking after the warm up, and we hadn't even started sparring any rounds! So I figure that it is pointless to train on this low energy, I'm going to eat healthy, ban junk and fast food and try not to pay attention to the scale(we weigh-in every tuesday and friday as a team AND I have a friendly bet with Erika so we weigh-in every wednesday), even though it will be next to impossible. My workouts were so unprductive last week due to how weak I felt that I don't want to sacrafice my developement for weight loss. I believe I can still lose a significant amount if I continue to eat well and train hard and stick to our team running regiment. Hopefully I make the 139, we'll see.
Other than that, I feel pretty good. I've done my best to keep my personal life seperate from my blog although sometimes it is difficult. So much of my journey to box IS personal. It's emotional and everything in my life operates around my boxing, so it is always a challenge to seperate the two. Lately is has been a challenge though, my personal life is, how can I put it, 'colourful' I guess, for lack of the right word. Things never seem right or balanced and as I search for that balance, the only thing that ever feels right is being in the gym. Being in the gym. An addiction. And as an addict, I understand my condition all too well.
Which brings up some details. We are looking for me to compete at the 139lbs weight class, the next category above will be 147lbs. Syd would like to see me fight at 139lbs. We feel that the 147 lbs category will be tougher for me, and that I will be able to 'hold my own' better at 139. At the time of the tryouts I was 153ish. This morning I was 145. Last week I managed to get down to 142.6, but that was after a workout in a sweatsuit! Realistically I have to get to 142, the rest of the weight I can lose overnight and in a sweatsuit, simply losing 'water' weight. The last time I remember weighing 140lbs, I was in grade 10. I've been a little concerned with how I would feel at that weight so I wanted to get to it as soon as I could before the tournament. The weight cut has not gone well for me. Last week, I feel I dropped too much, too quickly and was very weak in training. Last tuesday in sparring, my legs were shaking after the warm up, and we hadn't even started sparring any rounds! So I figure that it is pointless to train on this low energy, I'm going to eat healthy, ban junk and fast food and try not to pay attention to the scale(we weigh-in every tuesday and friday as a team AND I have a friendly bet with Erika so we weigh-in every wednesday), even though it will be next to impossible. My workouts were so unprductive last week due to how weak I felt that I don't want to sacrafice my developement for weight loss. I believe I can still lose a significant amount if I continue to eat well and train hard and stick to our team running regiment. Hopefully I make the 139, we'll see.
Other than that, I feel pretty good. I've done my best to keep my personal life seperate from my blog although sometimes it is difficult. So much of my journey to box IS personal. It's emotional and everything in my life operates around my boxing, so it is always a challenge to seperate the two. Lately is has been a challenge though, my personal life is, how can I put it, 'colourful' I guess, for lack of the right word. Things never seem right or balanced and as I search for that balance, the only thing that ever feels right is being in the gym. Being in the gym. An addiction. And as an addict, I understand my condition all too well.
Friday, March 15, 2013
The Future...
It's been a little over a week since Denton's fight and the news of making the GoldenGloves team. Things are still pretty exciting, it was an exciting week. I've had a chance to reflect on Denton's big win, I've also had a chance to spend time with the champ and get his insight on his fight, boxing, life, his and mine, and really just enjoy his company as a friend. But truthfully most of the time we spend together is spent talking about boxing, which both of us could do all day. There is such a humility in him that is admirable, here he is, at a huge turning point in his career, coming off the biggest most significant win in his life, yet, he is constantly trying to help me, give me guidance and advice, doing whatever he can to see to it that I reach my dream. Selfless. Along with spending time with Denton, I was also humbled today, by a group of youngsters I had the privilege of spending time with this week. They, along with Denton, gave me another reminder about what life is all about, what I am here for, what we all are here for...
There is something so magical that happens when you spend time with kids. When you share a smile or a laugh with a young person, it is so genuine, so innocent, so pure. They can't easily hide things. If they are upset, happy, tired, bored, you know it, instantly. They haven't learned the art of "BS" yet. You always know where you stand with a kid, if you don't know how they feel by looking at them, just ask them, they'll tell you. I had a great opportunity this week. There was a march break camp for kids at the gym, and I assisted in teaching the kids some boxing. We really had fun. Today I had a chance to talk with them though. We gathered around and I told them about my journey, how I arrived at this point in my life and why boxing is so important to me. I suppose the discussion was meant to inspire them, but ironically, it was them that inspired me. I got a chance to know them, what their dreams are, the things they like, we talked about god, and how they pray, we talked about the importance of helping people, and to always do your best. I was amazed at their answers, how insightful they were, but mostly I was inspired by how grateful they were for the things they have in life, and how much thought they gave to those around the world that were not as fortunate. I have really been focused on my efforts in training for the GoldenGloves tournament. So many people have congratulated me, people are happy for me, people are proud. I admit I've taken satisfaction and pride in making the team. I'm looking forward to my first fight, the official start of my competitive journey. All this credit and reward has been given to me, it's easy to forget the reason that I started this jouney in the first place...
A simple life. Live a good one. Live it clean. Do your best. Before you leave, leave it better than you left it. How do we do that? We teach our young. What do we teach them? I suppose that's different from person to person. We all have different gifts, we all have special qualities, we're not all the same, we all have something different to pass on, we all feel that there are certain things that are important in life, some, more than others. We all want our youth to do better than us. They are our future. We want something out of them. How do we get them to do it? How do we get them to believe us? I think, we show them. If I only had one thing to tell a child, it would be this. Dream. Dream big. Dream and don't let anyone or anything stop you from going after it. As long as you are not hurting anyone else, pursue your dream to the end, until it's achieved. So for me, it's easy. How could I tell a child to go after their dream if I don't go after mine. Boxing brings out the best in me. The people in my life, everyone I meet that becomes part of my life, they all deserve the best in me. Whatever I can give.
These youngsters really taught me something today. It's a responsibility we all have, to make ourselves better, to guide our youth through our actions, to help them help others, to achieve their dreams, to make the world a better place, through love and the old fashioned method of trying. I really feel grateful that I met these young people this week, their smiles, their laughter, their energy, it helped me gain even more clarity in what I'm doing, and the reasons I'm doing it. More importantly, it was a refreshing experience and reminder at how much joy it is to work with kids, how much you can give them, the knowledge, the wisdom, but really the best thing you can give them...is your time. And really, that was the best thing THEY gave me.
There is something so magical that happens when you spend time with kids. When you share a smile or a laugh with a young person, it is so genuine, so innocent, so pure. They can't easily hide things. If they are upset, happy, tired, bored, you know it, instantly. They haven't learned the art of "BS" yet. You always know where you stand with a kid, if you don't know how they feel by looking at them, just ask them, they'll tell you. I had a great opportunity this week. There was a march break camp for kids at the gym, and I assisted in teaching the kids some boxing. We really had fun. Today I had a chance to talk with them though. We gathered around and I told them about my journey, how I arrived at this point in my life and why boxing is so important to me. I suppose the discussion was meant to inspire them, but ironically, it was them that inspired me. I got a chance to know them, what their dreams are, the things they like, we talked about god, and how they pray, we talked about the importance of helping people, and to always do your best. I was amazed at their answers, how insightful they were, but mostly I was inspired by how grateful they were for the things they have in life, and how much thought they gave to those around the world that were not as fortunate. I have really been focused on my efforts in training for the GoldenGloves tournament. So many people have congratulated me, people are happy for me, people are proud. I admit I've taken satisfaction and pride in making the team. I'm looking forward to my first fight, the official start of my competitive journey. All this credit and reward has been given to me, it's easy to forget the reason that I started this jouney in the first place...
A simple life. Live a good one. Live it clean. Do your best. Before you leave, leave it better than you left it. How do we do that? We teach our young. What do we teach them? I suppose that's different from person to person. We all have different gifts, we all have special qualities, we're not all the same, we all have something different to pass on, we all feel that there are certain things that are important in life, some, more than others. We all want our youth to do better than us. They are our future. We want something out of them. How do we get them to do it? How do we get them to believe us? I think, we show them. If I only had one thing to tell a child, it would be this. Dream. Dream big. Dream and don't let anyone or anything stop you from going after it. As long as you are not hurting anyone else, pursue your dream to the end, until it's achieved. So for me, it's easy. How could I tell a child to go after their dream if I don't go after mine. Boxing brings out the best in me. The people in my life, everyone I meet that becomes part of my life, they all deserve the best in me. Whatever I can give.
These youngsters really taught me something today. It's a responsibility we all have, to make ourselves better, to guide our youth through our actions, to help them help others, to achieve their dreams, to make the world a better place, through love and the old fashioned method of trying. I really feel grateful that I met these young people this week, their smiles, their laughter, their energy, it helped me gain even more clarity in what I'm doing, and the reasons I'm doing it. More importantly, it was a refreshing experience and reminder at how much joy it is to work with kids, how much you can give them, the knowledge, the wisdom, but really the best thing you can give them...is your time. And really, that was the best thing THEY gave me.
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
A Day For Me To Smile
Before the tryouts last thursday, I came to terms. Although I knew that it would mean a lot to me to make the team, I also knew that my chances were small and that it wouldn't matter either way, my pursuit of my dream would still be on, so going into the tryouts my mindset was to not let the result determine my attitude going forward. Besides there are so many good boxers at our gym, there would be no shame in not making it.
A day after the tryouts, and the days coming into monday(the day the team would be posted) I was at peace with things. I did my best, got personal bests in everything, looked bad in sparring, got hurt bad(body is now bruised where I took the shot and experiencing some internal pain) but knew that I didn't take a knee, I didn't go down when I could've, when I know that many would have. Out of everything I took out of it, I took that. But I honestly felt that I didn't make the team, so when monday came, I went to the gym, trained with Lucas, got my work in and left. I didn't inquire about who made the team, in fact Lucas and I had a brief discussion, he even suggested that nothing had been determined yet. It didn't matter, my mind was actually on Denton, he was fighting the most important fight of his life, a fight that if he would won would change his immediate future in boxing, he would win the North American title, and he would then contend for a world title. If he won. I was nervous. I also felt the nerves of everyone at the gym, I would be corresponding with Jags with updates, and I could feel her anxiety along with EVERYONE at the gym. It was nervous time. Denton has meant so much to me as a boxer and friend, he has meant so much to everyone at BBSV. It would also be huge for Syd. And we all know how important Syd is to everyone in the community, especially his BBSV family. So actually, all my focus was on Denton's fight, I wanted him to win so badly, I was nervous.
Then I get sent 2 pictures on my phone. One was from Jags(Eryn Aguiar, runs BBSV) it was a picture of my friend D-Mac down on one knee, the other photo was from D-Mac, explaining why. It was a photo of the list of fighters that were on the 2013 GoldenGloves Team, my name was on it. I made the team. With a msg from D-Mac expressing his happiness that we were now officially teammates. For those of you that have followed my journey, you'll remember that D-Mac and I fought in my first and only exhibition fight. We've been close friends ever since. Devin also just avenged a loss on Sunday, he won a fight. So we were celebrating on many levels. Out of respect for my fellow BBSV boxers, I didn't want to blog, I know that they read it, and I have so much love and respect for them, they deserved to be on the team too. Everyone worked so hard and gave it everything they had, poored their heart and soul into that gym, into that tryout, we were all champions, regardless of who made that list. But I can't lie, I was happy, and I was emotional. Very. When I think of this journey, all the ups and mostly downs, everything that I have been through...There isn't much time to celebrate however, there is much work to be done, and it appears I have an injury, but Dr T will access that tomorrow, anyways, I've been in worse pain, I'm...used to it. If I've grown accustomed to anything, it's pain.
I allowed myself to be emotional for a bit, but my attention was quickly shifted to Dangerous Denton Daley. My friend, our friend. Someone we all look up to at the gym, we all love him. We've all seen him work his ass off, we've seen him help so many people, including me(Denton cornered my fight against Devin) he's always been there for me, ever since I joined the gym. He has time for everyone, he represents the gym and the community with class. Denton is our pride and joy. He's an extension of Syd, a champion in every way just like Syd was, like Syd is. Yesterday was a day I'll never forget, it was one of the happiest days of my life, I watched my friend and idol display an unreal show of boxing, it was an honour to be there, an honour to share the moment with THE NEW NABF CHAMPION, Dentooooooon, Dangerooooous, Daaaaaaaleeeeeey. 10 rounds to zero, he won.
A day after the tryouts, and the days coming into monday(the day the team would be posted) I was at peace with things. I did my best, got personal bests in everything, looked bad in sparring, got hurt bad(body is now bruised where I took the shot and experiencing some internal pain) but knew that I didn't take a knee, I didn't go down when I could've, when I know that many would have. Out of everything I took out of it, I took that. But I honestly felt that I didn't make the team, so when monday came, I went to the gym, trained with Lucas, got my work in and left. I didn't inquire about who made the team, in fact Lucas and I had a brief discussion, he even suggested that nothing had been determined yet. It didn't matter, my mind was actually on Denton, he was fighting the most important fight of his life, a fight that if he would won would change his immediate future in boxing, he would win the North American title, and he would then contend for a world title. If he won. I was nervous. I also felt the nerves of everyone at the gym, I would be corresponding with Jags with updates, and I could feel her anxiety along with EVERYONE at the gym. It was nervous time. Denton has meant so much to me as a boxer and friend, he has meant so much to everyone at BBSV. It would also be huge for Syd. And we all know how important Syd is to everyone in the community, especially his BBSV family. So actually, all my focus was on Denton's fight, I wanted him to win so badly, I was nervous.
Then I get sent 2 pictures on my phone. One was from Jags(Eryn Aguiar, runs BBSV) it was a picture of my friend D-Mac down on one knee, the other photo was from D-Mac, explaining why. It was a photo of the list of fighters that were on the 2013 GoldenGloves Team, my name was on it. I made the team. With a msg from D-Mac expressing his happiness that we were now officially teammates. For those of you that have followed my journey, you'll remember that D-Mac and I fought in my first and only exhibition fight. We've been close friends ever since. Devin also just avenged a loss on Sunday, he won a fight. So we were celebrating on many levels. Out of respect for my fellow BBSV boxers, I didn't want to blog, I know that they read it, and I have so much love and respect for them, they deserved to be on the team too. Everyone worked so hard and gave it everything they had, poored their heart and soul into that gym, into that tryout, we were all champions, regardless of who made that list. But I can't lie, I was happy, and I was emotional. Very. When I think of this journey, all the ups and mostly downs, everything that I have been through...There isn't much time to celebrate however, there is much work to be done, and it appears I have an injury, but Dr T will access that tomorrow, anyways, I've been in worse pain, I'm...used to it. If I've grown accustomed to anything, it's pain.
I allowed myself to be emotional for a bit, but my attention was quickly shifted to Dangerous Denton Daley. My friend, our friend. Someone we all look up to at the gym, we all love him. We've all seen him work his ass off, we've seen him help so many people, including me(Denton cornered my fight against Devin) he's always been there for me, ever since I joined the gym. He has time for everyone, he represents the gym and the community with class. Denton is our pride and joy. He's an extension of Syd, a champion in every way just like Syd was, like Syd is. Yesterday was a day I'll never forget, it was one of the happiest days of my life, I watched my friend and idol display an unreal show of boxing, it was an honour to be there, an honour to share the moment with THE NEW NABF CHAMPION, Dentooooooon, Dangerooooous, Daaaaaaaleeeeeey. 10 rounds to zero, he won.
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